a lil monolog
Friday, July 22, 2011,
xsangke, da habes minggu ke-2 clinical years. i have another nearly 3 years more of classes to attend. jgnla pancit Syafiqah. nway, minggu ni mcm interesting to me. mcm2 bnde lwk jadi, sedih, memalukan, sume la. but in the end, im happie all those things happened. dsbbkn we only have 6 weeks kat sini, smorg pown mcm berusaha la nk belaja sbnyk mungkin from seniors sblom ktorg pindah klang. to those yg ade buddy besar, or kwn2 seniors yg sudi mngajar, beruntung la kan. tp to those yg xde, terpakse mnumpang2, x pown cari inisiatif laen.
Alhamdulillah, i have a senior yg sggop mngajar. but of course, his time mcm limited. dye pown kna blaja utk diri sndiri kan. so, kkdg pg je la ward sndiri. tp kalu pg ward sndiri, tu la, history taking j la. itu pown x sure btowl k x. dsbbkn itu la, i dcided, utk do something else. i rmmbered Proff Rokiah words : MAKE THE HOSPITAL UR HOME, N U WILL B HAPPIE IN IT. at 1st, it's hard for me to understand it. but now, i do. i dcdd, every time i nk pg wardround, im gonna set my mind, that im gonna go to my own PLAYGROUND, not a HOSPITAL. kurang sikit rse cuak kan.
so, last tuesday, while walking along the ward's corridor, i saw a nurse holding something. i was kindda curious to know what that thing was. i dont know how i did it, but i actually went after the nurse. i stopped her, n asked her what was she doing. n i asked whether it's ok if i followed her and if she could teach me a few things. Alhamdulillah, she said yes. so that day, i learnt a few ward chores from a nurse. thanks akak. since that incident, i realised, ilmu ni, kalu kite nak, kite kena kejar. jgn harap dye dtg bergolek. so i decided, lps ni nk keja DOCTOR plak. so yes, i actually went after a doctor. oh pengalaman tu, x yah ckp la lawaknye.
i actually said this :
Assalamualaikum Doctor, tadi saya dah clark patient nie, skrg boleyh saya tahu doctor nk buat ape dgn dia? boleyh aja kami?
Awk ni sape? (muke dye SHOCK gyler)
Oh, sy Syafiqah, pelajar tahun 3, ni kwn saye ___________ (name kwn biar rahsia)
Awk nk belaja ape?
Ape2 je yg doctor nk aja, sume sy nak. boleyh?
Tadi awk kate awk da clark patient ni kan? skrg bgtaw sy, ape yg awk tahu.
dgn terketar2, present je la ape yg i know kan. dgn harapan, he will accept me as his student. lps je present, dye pandang, then dye snyum. pastu kate, NOT BAD. OK, SY TNYE, AWK JWB. IKOT SAYE. starting from that, dye benarkn la ktorg ikot dye ke hulu hilir. kat every patients, dye tnye ktorg soalan. ade yg boley jwb, x kurang jugak blmbak yg ktorg x leh jwb. i even answered with stupid answers. tp to me, biarla dye rse im stupid ke ape, yg penting, i know what i dont know, nnty boleyh bace lagy, perbaiki diri. n paling penting, i want the knowledge he shared. sblom berpisah, ckp la thanx dgn dye kan, pastu dye ckp : Kalu nk belaja lgy, cari la sy.
balik j dat ward, me n my friend was like smiling from ears to ears. ade org yg taw, ade jugak tnye mcm ni:
Pqa, x malu ke keja doct sume?
Knape nk malu?
Urm, mne taw dye xnk aja?
So knape kalu dye x nk aja?
honstly, i have come to a point, yg x kesah la nk kna pekik ke ape. kate pown student. jd HO esok pown, mmg akan jd mangse tengking. so baek practise skrg. MALU? malu ape? mencari ilmu tu kan JIHAD, so nk malu knape? malu beribadah ke?
mmg mngaku, penat, letih, sume la. kecewa pown ade kkdg. rejections, mmg a common things. nurse tarek muke, doctor xnk lyn kite, patients buat2 tdo. tp, those are the things that gonna make u stronger kan? bnde2 yg akan mngajar kite. semoga dgn pengalaman ni sume, i can not only b a doctor who treats a patient, but 2 understand them too. :)
haritu lps solat, ttbe bnde ni dtg dkt otak :
"ILMU ALLAH TU LUAS, MANE MUNGKIN KITE BERJAYA MENGETAHUI KESEMUANYA, TAK MENGETAHUI SECEBIS DARINYA, BUKAN BERMAKNA KITA BODOH, TETAPI BERERTI KITE HARUS BERUSAHA MEMPELAJARINYA"
so, to those who thinks it's so wrong to look foolish, atau rse stupid, think again eh :)
new past